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May 29, 2005
Random Thoughts on Michael Jackson, Madagascar (the movie), Wedding Attire, and Sex Offenders!
Am I the only one who has almost zero interest in the Michael Jackson trial? The only thing I care about is whether Jackson is convicted or acquitted; aside from that, I just don’t give a damn. What kind of parents would let their children spend private (or any) time with this man anyway? Either you hope your child gets touched so you can score a heavy settlement or you don't realize that there is a possibility that your child might get touched, in which case you're a complete moron. Reasons #53 and #54 why some people should not be allowed to procreate...
When I was watching Madagascar on Friday, I kept thinking, “I wish Hollywood stars would stop getting roles as the voices of animated characters.” Each time Alex (the lion) spoke in the film, I couldn’t help myself from picturing Ben Stiller playing....well, playing Ben Stiller (it seems like he does that a lot, doesn’t it?). Lending one’s voice to an animated film used to be considered lowbrow in Hollywood – I wish we’d return to that era because too often I find the actor’s recognizable voice to detract from the character itself. The film was cute, but the plot was incredibly weak. If it weren’t for the penguins, which had limited, but memorable screen time, this film would have been a total stinker. Nevertheless, because I laughed a few times, the Thinking Fool’s final grade: C.
I’ve been to about ten weddings in my life. I think I’ve been on-time to two of them. This weekend’s wedding was not one of the two. It’s not that I intentionally run late; I just seem to always get there right after the bride has glided down the aisle. At least I'm not like the bastards who only show up at the receptions.
Speaking of weddings, here’s a piece of unsolicited advice for women who don’t know what to wear to these events. If you try on a dress and find yourself thinking, “Wow, this would be great to wear clubbing in Vegas,” find something else to wear. One of the bride's friends looked like she was auditioning for a role in a movie about streetwalkers.
Oliver Stone was arrested Friday night for driving under the influence and possession of drugs. Stone should have been arrested years ago for churning out horrendous movies. At least Spike Lee has a “hit” (as in an actually good film) once in awhile. If only Stone were so kind to his audiences...(who keeps paying money to see his films anyway?)
Finally, how about this for the feel-good story of the week? Nearly 800 convicted sex offenders have gotten Medicaid-funded prescriptions for Viagra and similar drugs. Kind of makes you wonder if the government will start providing getaway cars to bank robbers. And we wonder why we have deficits.
