November 02, 2005
Happy Half-Birthday to ThinkingFool.com - Time to Celebrate, Spread the Word, and Review What's Been Written Thus Far!
Bring out the corkscrews and pull the champagne bottles out of the oven; it’s time to celebrate! Today, thinkingfool.com is exactly six months old! Some of you have been around since day one. Most of you have not. Some of you awakened today in gigantic puddles of urine. Fortunately, most of you did not. Regardless of whether you are young or old, gay or straight, Christian or Buddhist, or perhaps even an NYU Jew, one thing is certain – your patronage at this site is greatly appreciated (unless you are a child molester. If that’s the case, go to your nearest pawn shop, purchase a revolver, load the revolver with six bullets, and play Russian roulette until you “win,” (which ought to happen on the first pull if you’ve followed the instructions).). Over the last six months, this site has increased in value from zero dollars to more than $4,000. With a few more readers, some naked pictures of famous celebrities, and more breaking news stories, thinkingfool.com’s worth is liable to skyrocket past the $5,000 mark. YOU can help!
To celebrate six months of blogging, I have a favor to ask of you. If you enjoy reading this site, why not tell a friend or two? If you don't have any friends, tell a homeless person. If you don't see any homeless people on a regular basis, move to a city. If you don't like cities, what's the matter with you? I can’t offer much in return, but if you promise to tell a friend about this blog, I can guarantee that the next time you watch a Ron Popeil infomercial, Ron will say something like, “And it won’t even cost you $130 like you all may be thinking.” I don't know about you, but I've NEVER once been thinking, "I bet this will cost me 'X' dollars" when Popeil has said, "And it won't even cost you 'X' dollars like you all may be thinking."
As loyal readers know, this blog has undergone quite a metamorphosis since its inception. Gone are the days when the site’s sole purpose was to allow crack dealers and pimps across the nation to have a convenient forum to exchange ideas about how to flourish in today’s economy. Gone are the days when I railed against anything involving Roman Polanski (oh wait, those days are still here). Today, for better or worse (and I realize oftentimes it is for worse), thinkingfool.com is updated nearly every weekday. Fortunately with more frequent updates have come more frequent readers. In fact, yesterday, more people visited thinkingfool.com than ever before. And yes, this excites me - no, not in the sexual sense.
Thank you for your support. I hope it continues. Oh, and for crying out loud, if you haven't bookmarked this page, do it NOW!
For all the new visitors, you probably are thinking, "How can I read all of the good entries that I missed without having to suffer through the crappy ones?" Well, consider it your lucky day. As rated by me, GE Friend, the Deer Assassin, and my imaginary friend Hugo, the following are the top thirteen entries the Fool has written thus far. (We couldn't agree on #14, so we had to shorten the list to thirteen entries. Hey, rules are rules and Hugo can be a real pain in the ass sometimes.)
#13 Hammers, Neighbors, and Smoke Alarms
#12 Why Successories will NEVER Hire Me
#11 Osama and the Supreme Court – Why Not?
#10 Why You Should Be Nice To Me on an Airplane
#9 My Run-In With the Chinese Diplomat
#8 Coming Out of the Closet – A Classmate’s Story
#7 How Being an Atheist Can Get One in Trouble
#6 It Seemed like a Good Idea at the Time
#5 Ten Practical Rules for Raising Kids
#4 In the Land Down Under, You May Want to Refrain from Ordering Pancakes
#3 An Open Letter from Amber Frey’s Daughter to Santa Claus (Without a doubt the most controversial entry thus far)
#2 Harriet Miers Pens a Letter to the President
#1 Ideas for Negotiating Your Next Lease – Threaten them with Porn! (Still holds a soft place in my heart!)
