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February 07, 2006
And the winner for “Best Thing a Professor Ever Said to a Law Student” is...
If Clarence Thomas ever wants to retire from the Supreme Court, he ought to consider teaching law at Arizona State University. Yes, yes, I know what you’re thinking. “Arizona State!?! Fool, why in the hell would he want to teach THERE? That’s not even the best law school in the state!”
Well, let’s just say I think he’d get along really well with one particular member of the faculty.
Picture it, December, a dozen years ago.
According to the Phoenix New Times, approximately 100 rowdy 1Ls, all thrilled that their first semester of law school was finally over, decided to do what many law students do at the end of the semester – they decided to go out and drink! This particular group went from restaurant/bar to restaurant/bar rejoicing in the pleasure that was not having to study for a few weeks.
Several professors joined them, including the man who taught Civil Procedure.
When an attractive female student entered his gaze, the eccentric Civ Pro prof decided to break the ice. At first, his method seemed rather conventional.
“Hey, are you in my class?” he asked.
Before the attractive 1L could utter a word, the professor looked her over and decided to journey down the road less traveled.
“Well goddamn, I’d know if you were in my class, ‘cause I wouldn’t be there. I’d be home fucking you every day!”
Yes, you read that correctly.
Want to see it again?
“Well goddamn, I’d know if you were in my class, ‘cause I wouldn’t be there. I’d be home fucking you every day!”
How much money would you pay to be able to go back in time and witness that?
Was the professor polite? Hardly.
Appropriate? Not even by Clarence Thomas' standards.
Yet, was that the greatest thing a law professor has ever said to a student? Until I hear otherwise, without a doubt!
Comments
At first, his method was rather unconventional.
You mean "conventional," right? Because he later took the road less traveled?
Fantastic story. I went to the wrong law school.
Posted by: Neel Mehta at February 7, 2006 03:51 AM
I DEFINITELY mean "conventional," not "unconventional." I tried to fix/edit the entry to reflect the appropriate change, but Movable Type is acting like a douche bag this morning. I'll try again tonight. Thanks for the tip.
UPDATE: ALL is fixed now! The day after I take someone to task for not spelling correctly, I have a typo. Such is life.
Posted by: Fool at February 7, 2006 09:02 AM
LOL! Thomas probably wouldn't get along with a particular member of the faculty at another Arizona law school!
Posted by: NYU Jew at February 7, 2006 12:46 PM
Although I share the judicial philosophies of Scalia and Thomas, I've never been vehemently anti Sandra Day! The Deer Assassin is a different story. The day she announced her retirement, I had the following voicemail: "Ding dong, the wicked witch is dead!"
Posted by: Fool at February 7, 2006 08:32 PM
“Well goddamn, I’d know if you were in my class, ‘cause I wouldn’t be there. I’d be home fucking you every day!”
But if he wouldn't be there, how would he know that she was in his class???
Posted by: NYU Jew at February 8, 2006 09:17 PM
But if he wouldn't be there, how would he know that she was in his class???
Yeah, because THAT'S the flaw in his logic.
Posted by: Neel Mehta at February 10, 2006 02:56 AM
Damn, man... :)
Posted by: The BLS at February 10, 2006 10:57 AM
