« The Fool and the Karate Teacher: If Only I Knew Then What I Know Now | Main | Searching for Porn, but Finding the Fool Instead! »
February 05, 2006
Charlie Gibson, You Sound Like a Horrible Human Being
Charlie Gibson is a bitter, condescending jerk. At least, he sure sounds like one. Last week, David Westin, President of ABC News, asked Gibson and Diane Sawyer to fill in for World News Tonight co-anchor Bob Woodruff while Woodruff recovers from injuries he suffered in Iraq. The New York Times quoted Gibson as saying, "I was doing it [substitute anchoring] before. [But then t]hey gave the job to Bob and Elizabeth [Vargas]. Then back you come. I can see the viewer might be a bit confused about what's going on. But you just do it." Talk about sounding bitter that ABC decided to go with Woodruff and Vargas instead of him. Also, what a martyr (“But you just do it.”)!
Because Charlie seems to think we’re all idiots who will be terribly confused by his returned presence on the set of WNT, I’ve generated a ten-point summary he can provide WNT viewers to help us understand things better. That way, hopefully, we won’t be so damn confused.
1. Peter Jennings was diagnosed with lung cancer.
2. Charlie Gibson and Elizabeth Vargas filled Jennings' shoes while he was being treated for cancer.
3. Unfortunately, Jennings died.
4. ABC didn’t know whom to anoint as the new WNT anchor, but Gibson, Vargas, and Woodruff were the leading candidates.
5. ABC decided to go with Woodruff and Vargas, making them co-anchors.
6. That means Charlie Gibson didn’t get the job.
7. After less than a month of the new broadcast, Woodruff suffered a grave injury in Iraq. It was the lead story in every major newspaper.
8. Because of Woodruff’s injuries, ABC needs someone to co-anchor with Vargas until Woodruff can return. The network asked Charlie Gibson and Diane Sawyer to do just that.
9. Charlie Gibson thinks viewers might be confused when they see him back on the air in the WNT timeslot. After all, he didn’t get the permanent gig.
10. When Gibson appears, the Thinking Fool will be watching Bob Schieffer or Brian Williams. They’re not quite as condescending. Of course, that's if I can figure out how to change the channel! After all, that's a pretty confusing process.


