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March 07, 2006
Your Doctor Can't Hold a Candle to My Doctor
After the bar exam, I had the luxury of spending a few wonderful days in my hometown catching up with my family, friends, hookers, crack dealers... you know, the normal cast of characters in every young man’s life. I also made sure I had time to see my doctor to get a routine physical. (Much to the dismay of the Cigarette Peddler, my health is excellent.)
I’ve always adored my doctor. Unlike my degenerate ex-brother-in-law, my doctor is actually an excellent physician, not a complete, bumbling moron of a doctor like my sister’s ex-husband. Plus, he’s funny as hell and returns emails and phone calls faster than Jimmy Carter can say, “I am a horrible human being.”
To top it off, during my recent visit, my doctor actually gave me a stereo. That’s right, he gave me a stereo. (Lest you think this was an attempt by him to touch me in special places, it wasn’t. He’s moving offices and didn’t want to transport the stereo from his current office to his new one. Plus, keep in mind that he’s a doctor. They don’t need to bribe you in order to touch you in special places.)
After he helped me transport half the stereo to the parking garage, I followed my doctor back to his office so I could get the speakers.
Doctor: See that guy up there in the maroon sweater?
Thinking Fool: Yes.
Doctor: Well, he’s my next patient.
Thinking Fool: Oh.
Doctor: He’s a retired radiologist and a TOTAL asshole.
Needless to say, my doctor is the best doctor in the universe.
Comments
He does sound like a good doctor. Mine never lets you leave the office without some free drug samples.
Posted by: LAlawyer at March 7, 2006 02:54 PM
Oh, I forgot to mention I scored 40 Ambien Pills as well. There are good doctors and then there are doctors like my degenerate ex-brother-in-law...
Posted by: Fool at March 7, 2006 11:09 PM
