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April 04, 2006
And Justice for All... or at least ONE!
Papa Fool has been an attorney for more than 35 years. He’s used the law to accomplish a lot of good in his life, but the following is perhaps my favorite story. Several years ago, the janitor who cleans his office building approached Papa Fool and told him that the owners of another building were refusing to pay $1,850 that they owed him for janitorial services. In other words, the other building's owners were douche bag extraordinaires. Apparently they thought the “dumb Mexican” would have no recourse; so they tried to stiff the poor guy. “Tried” is the operative word. After sending the building’s owners a letter demanding $2,350, Papa Fool received a phone call from their representative. (It's amazing how people behave differently once they receive a letter from an actual attorney.)
Building’s Representative: Hi, we received your letter about [janitor’s] services and you know, I talked to my bosses, and they don’t want to get involved in some sort of legal battle, so they’ve agreed to settle this matter for $1,000.
Papa Fool: Well, you’re going to have to read my letter more carefully because we want $2,350.
Building’s Representative: Well, I know that’s what you said you wanted, but I don’t think that’s realistic.
Papa Fool: We want $2,350.
Building’s Representative: Let me see what I can do.
A few days passed after that conversation.
Building’s Representative: Hi, Mr. [Papa Fool]. I’ve got some good news. I talked to my bosses and they authorized me to settle this matter for $1,500. So, should I send over the paperwork?
Papa Fool: Only if you plan to send a check for $2,350.
Another couple days passed.
Building’s Representative: Okay, my bosses admit that they owe your guy $1,850 and they’re willing to pay him that. They apologize for delaying payment and want you to know it won’t happen again. So, I assume we have an agreement.
Papa Fool: No, we don’t have an agreement. We’ll have an agreement when you offer $2,350.
Building’s Representative: But, your guy only did $1,850 worth of work.
Papa Fool: That may be true, but I’m fully prepared to litigate this case if we don’t receive $2,350. I'm sure a jury will love your clients.
After about an hour passed, the building’s representative called back.
Building’s Representative: Okay, my clients have agreed to pay $2,350.
So, in the end, the evil company ended up paying $500 more than it should have, and the hard-working janitor ended up making $500 more than he should have. Sometimes lawyers really can do good.
