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June 28, 2007
Dear Fool
Dear Brokenhearted Mom,
Jack Kevorkian is out of prison. Do us all a huge favor. Call him.
Your “dilemma” can’t possibly be real. If it is, then your letter is one of the most pathetic ones I’ve ever read. To recap, you have a crush on a 19-year-old coworker and aren’t even woman enough to bang him on your own? Instead, you’re trying to get your daughter to bang him, and at the tender age of 17 to boot? What is wrong with you?
Oh yes, I realize you wrote that “it is not sexual,” but if that’s the dung you’re trying to sell, I got news for you, sister; ain’t nobody buying. It’s blatantly obvious that you want to play a fun little game of “Don’t you dare pull your thing out of me until it’s exploding like a firecracker on the Fourth of July!”
Instead of trying to live vicariously through your daughter, you ought to think about visiting a costume store, buying a gimmick that allows you to dress up like a cow, and sauntering over to your local slaughterhouse. Just say “moo” a few times and everything ought to work out perfectly.
Let me know how it turns out,
Thinking Fool
Comments
That has got to be one of the creepiest things I've read all week. I hope she doesn't inform her daughter of her little revelation.
Brilliant response. Much better than "Amy" could have put it.
Posted by: mm at June 28, 2007 10:40 AM
by the way, I tagged for for a meme. Check out my latest post for details.
Posted by: mm at June 28, 2007 11:55 AM
Maybe she isn't getting any loving from her husband and is hoping to get some from a 19-year old stud.
Posted by: Ming the Merciless at June 29, 2007 12:01 AM
